Parents often experience sibling rivalry when their children are young. Ideally, the children outgrow this as they get older and go on to have a strong relationship.
But this isn’t always the case. In some situations, sibling rivalry will last into adulthood. It may even lead to an estate dispute when the parents pass away. Why would this happen?
Siblings as adversaries
The problem is that long-standing sibling rivalry essentially makes the two people feel like adversaries who are competing for resources. They both want to receive a larger portion of their parents’ estate.
If the parents use unequal bequests, this can just cause those feelings of sibling rivalry to rise back up again. Maybe a younger sibling feels that the firstborn child has always been their parents’ favorite. And then, sure enough, the estate plan gives a greater portion of the assets to that older sibling. The younger one sees this as evidence that their parents loved their sibling more.
These sibling rivals may also feel an inherent compulsion to “win” any disagreement that they have. Many estate disputes revolve around items with sentimental value, for instance, so only one person can have that item. Siblings may spend months or years in arguments over items that have very little financial value.
How can you prevent this?
One of the best ways to prevent this is simply to talk to your children while you draft your estate plan. Make sure they know what you want and why you’ve made the decisions you’ve made. It’s also wise to look into your options to create an estate plan that works for these specific family dynamics. The more planning you can do in advance, the lower the odds of a dispute.
